Unforseeable Circumstances

April's eyes felt as if they burned. She hurried over to the sink and attempted to flush her eyes out with water. Her eyes still burned. Her heart thumped as she thought about the possible damage that had already been done.

She continued to flush out her eyes with water but nothing happened. Her eyes still burned. With her eyes closed, she made her way around the house with her arms outstretched, feeling around.
She grabbed the telephone and pressed the speed-dial button of her doctor. April told him that an accident happened and that she couldn't see. The doctor promised to rush over as soon as possible.
When Dr. Nichols arrived, he sat down on the sofa, then took out a mini-flashlight from his bag. He noticed all the expensive-looking furniture that she had. He noticed all the antique furniture she had. This stuff has got to be worth a fortune.

He forced her eyes open, then flashed the light in her face. "How did this happen?"
"I was using the can of aerosol," April said. "All of a sudden, I sprayed the air into my eyes. I guess I was holding the can the wrong way."

Dr. Nichols didn't notice anything wrong with her eyes. He gave her vision tests and didn't notice anything.

In his bag, Dr. Nichols had samples of a brand new vision drug that was guaranteed to repair eyesight. The drug was effective in counteracting chemicals accidentally sprayed into the eyes.
The Drug Administration hadn't approved the drug yet and it's side effects were still being investigated. The company that made the drug, Devlin McGregor, supplied Dr. Nichols with samples because he signed a contract with the company agreeing to terms that if the drug was approved, Dr. Nichols would use the drug exclusively for his patients with eye problems.

Dr. Nichols felt that the process for approving the drug was taking too long because he felt the drug worked fine and he used it on other patients with successful results. Also, he was in desperate need of the commission from the drug sales because his personal debt was mounting.

Dr. Nichols tried some preliminary cures to see if April's eyes got better. Nothing. April still complained that she couldn't see although the burning sensation in her eyes was reduced.
"Doctor, you have to help me, dammit," April said with an angry, trembling voice. "Give me anything."

"I have a drug that will cure you fast. However, I will require payment before I can give it to you."
"I'm blind and you're sitting there telling me that I have to pay you before I receive treatment? What the hell kind of doctor are you?"

"The kind that will give you a drug that's guaranteed to cure you after several doses."
"What's the name of the drug?"

"Provasic."

"I know that that drug hasn't been approved yet," April said coldly. She sat up in the chair and looked forward. She assumed Dr. Nichols was in front of her. He was to her right.

"I'll make a deal with you," April said. "If you cure me, I'll pay you a large sum despite the fact that I know I shouldn't pay you anything. Otherwise, I won't pay you anything."

"Okay, April we shall begin treatment immediately."

Dr. Nichols went to the kitchen and retrieved a knife. He placed the Provasic pills on the coffee table and cut each one in half. He placed them inside of an empty pill bottle and placed it in his jacket pocket.

"What I'm going to do is to give you the pill so that the swelling and irritation around your eye can go. I'm also going to get a cream for you to heal the burned skin around your eyes. I will monitor your progress every day and give you stronger doses until your eye is completely healed.
The doctor gave April the medicine then agreed with her on a time for them to meet every day for him to administer the medicine to her.

Over the next few days, the doctor gave April her medicine. He was purposefully giving her half the required dosage so that he can carry out a piece of furniture that was portable enough to place in his car.

Day after day, he took small tables, lamps, wooden mirrors, jewelry and painting that she had on the walls. He placed these items in the garage of his house.

At last, there was a day when the doctor felt that he got what he wanted. He gave April the proper dosage of the Provasic drug.

April rose from her feet. She looked around the house. "Doctor, the cure is not complete."

"What are you talking about?" Dr. Nichols said. He noticed that her eyes were focusing on certain objects. He felt there was no way that she was still blind."

"I cannot see half my house," she said.

"But you can see otherwise?" the doctor asked.

"Yes, I can see most of the house, but there seems to be a large part missing."

The doctor placed his hand in front of April's face. "How many fingers am I holding up?"

"Three," April said.

"Fantastic. You can see just fine. Now, about the payment procedure -"

"I am not paying you a damn thing. You didn't finish the job."

They continued arguing back and forth until the doctor threatened to bring forth a court case against April for refusing to pay him. April was not intimidated and she didn't give into the doctor's demands.

Dr. Nichols and April appeared before the court. The judge began his interrogation of April. "The doctor gave you the medicines necessary to heal your vision. However, you are not paying him. Why not?"

"He did not completely heal my vision," April replied.

"How can you say that?" the judge said. "You were able to find your way to this courtroom."

"Yes, your honor, but whenever I am home I cannot seem to see my furniture."

"What do you mean?" the judge said.

"When I get home, I can see everything except many of my antique furniture pieces. They are not there."

"You liar," the doctor screamed from across the courtroom. "I healed you and you are lying."
"How dare you say that-" April said.

"Order in the court," the judge yelled. He slammed the gravel on the pad, then cleared his throat. "We will investigate this case further. I want you to both report to April's house promptly at 10am tomorrow."

The next day, April and a court-appointed officer reported to her house promptly at 10am. Conspicuous by his absence was the doctor.

The officer looked around the house and noticed that all the furniture was gone. The officer got on the radio: "Dr. Nichols lied to us. Go get him right now and arrest him. Tell the judge to charge him with stealing from April."

The Brown Monster

Gary leaned over the edge of the subway platform and noticed that the train was not coming. "Fuck."

The rumbling in his lower abdomen started again, the butterflies in his stomach flared up, and the diarrhea feeling flared up in his genitals as if someone lightly slapped him there.

He looked again down the tunnel hoping to see the lights of an oncoming train. Nothing.

He knew that he shouldn't have had the fudge brownie a la mode. Or, maybe it was the bacon Swiss burger he had before that? In any case, he was sure that the three Guinness' didn't help either.
He closed his eyes and concentrated on tightening his butt cheeks. He willed the feeling to go away.

The train arrived. The diarrhea sensation whittled away. As Gary sat, he said a little prayer hoping that the feeling would not return and that the train would not experience any delays.
He didn't pray because he was religious - he prayed because he was in deep trouble and his Catholic upbringing taught him to pray in times of need.

The train sped along and reached the next express station quickly. Gary figured he'd make it home with no problems.

At the next station, the conductor announced that the train was being delayed for a slight moment. Immediately, Gary felt the butterflies in his stomach, then the gas bubbles building up in his intestines.

He knew that he couldn't just pass gas to feel better because, deep within his intestines, there was a beast waiting to be unleashed. He knew he was in trouble.

The train progressed smoothly but Gary felt that it was still too slow for the predicament that he was in. He was afraid that he may have to improvise.

He looked at the door that led from one subway car to the next. It was late at night and nobody was passing between the cars. He thought that maybe he can squat down between the cars and take care of business there. Nah, knowing his luck, somebody would walk in on him.

Shit, what was he to do? He couldn't just get off the train and go look for a bathroom. He was in upper-Manhattan and the neighborhoods were bad.

He decided to sit and suffer in silence because, if he moved, he felt that he would poop on himself.
Only ten more stops to go. He'd figure it would take about 15 minutes. He can only think about how inviting the toilet seat must be.

He fought the great brown monster by himself. Every time he felt that he was going to explode, he'd clench his butt cheeks and squeeze his PC muscle tightly. He'd also say a prayer. Sometimes, the feeling subsided but it didn't go away for good.

It was boiling in his intestines. The gas bubbles built up so much that he thought his intestines would explode. Suddenly his stomach made a horrible growl. The bubbles of gas were popping in his lower-back.

People in his car started looking around with weird looks on their faces trying to find out who the culprit was. Gary wanted to die. Thank God nobody noticed that it was him.
Gary was deep in meditation when the train finally reached his station. He snapped out of it then gingerly walked off the train.

Gary was almost walking on his tip-toes as he tried to hurry home. The beast in his belly growled and snarled as if it wanted to be unleashed. "Fuck you," he thought. "You will come out when I say you can come out."

He had to walk gingerly or else the impact of his footsteps would cause the monster to rear its ugly head.

"Gary," someone shouted. Gary looked up to see that it was Dave; someone he hadn't seen in over a year. Gary knew Dave would stop him to talk.

"How's everything going, man?" Dave said.

"Everything's cool. How about you?"

"Couldn't be better." A weird look appeared on Dave's face. "Are you okay, man?"

"Not really. I really have to go. Come by my apartment. I'm still at 14J." Gary started walking.
"Okay, Gary. I'll catch you soon."

Gary quickly walked into the building then waited for the elevator. It took its time coming down. Gary looked at the indicator which stayed still at "12". He felt the gas bubbles bursting in his intestines and felt that he couldn't take it. He knew he had to be strong. He came this far and knew he couldn't give up now.

Finally, the elevator started moving. It came down to "5" but stopped again. Gary felt as if he would faint. "Stay strong. Stay strong." He closed his eyes and only concentrated on keeping the monster under control.

The elevator came and, thankfully, nobody that Gary knew came out. The elevator doors closed.
As the elevator went up it did so slowly. The beast gave another angry roar in frustration. Finally, the elevator arrived at the 14th floor.

Gary quickly tiptoed to the door and started unlocking it. As he did so the beast made one last mad rush to come out.

"Stay inside, you son of a bitch," Gary growled. He unlocked the door and quickly ran into the bathroom. He hurriedly took off his pants and sat on the toilet. He didn't even have time to grab reading material.

He unleashed the monster. It came out roaring with an angry rage that shook the earth. The bathroom filled with the most god-awful stench created by the hand of man.
None of this affected Gary. He sat on his throne smiling - knowing that he was victorious over the angry brown beast.